Jie Jie

Arielle is becoming a great jie jie. Can really see that she is protective over Aaron and loves him so. When someone wants to carry him away, she will start to cry. She gets upset when he does not sit in his chair strapped with the seatbelt. When he climbs out, she scolds him. When I get panicky during the journey with Aaron loose, she will scream and ask me to "leave him, leave him" cos I will be pulling him to hold him in place. When I scold him for disturbing jie jie, at times she will say "never mind, leave him". She must have ti ti at home at night. Cannot leave him at po po's house. When we are at the supermarket and I threaten to leave him there she will pull and push him towards me and then ask me to "take him la ma". Its really cute to see them as Aaron adoringly calls "jie jie".."jie jie".

You are 2!

How time flies, Aaron is 2 today. What a journey he has been through with meningitis at 6 weeks, hands, foot and mouth at 6 months, bronchitis at 9 months and fever on and off, here and there. Now at 2, he is growing to be a tall "young man" though getting increasingly stubborn with a mind of his own. And all this while Thank God that He has led Aaron through every step. Aaron is God's blessing to us and he brings joy to the Gohs and Wees every hour of the day. His che che adores him though at time he infuriates her. Oh well...now to give him some form of toilet training of which I have been guilty of not doing yet....

Aaron, May God continue to bless you with wisdom, strength and stature. May good people always come your way and May you be a blessing to others always. and in whatever you do May you have God in mind. Amen.

Mama's Fault

Babies are helpless and they totally rely on parents to do things for them. What we decide to do have huge impact on them. They are practically at our mercy.

Aaron has recently turned 6 mths and so I thot it was time for him to start his infant cereal. Since he was sick when we came back fr Marudi, I gave him one week break and decided to start him on Monday 9/2/09. He seemed to be enjoying it. Gave him a bath after an hour and then decided to put him to sleep with 5 oz of EBM. He finished his EBM and I left him in his room to give Arielle a bath. When I finished with Arielle I heard him crying and found that he has vomited all over the mattress and his head had some of it when he rolled over it. I thot it was one of those things. I started to clean up but then he vomited again. Over the 2 hour period, he vomited non-stop and it was real pain to see his body go into spasm before each vomit. Jon & I took turns to call each other for help each time it happened. The final spasm came with nothing coming out, so we knew his stomach has been emptied. He was so tired after that I just held him in my arms and he slept.

After that he drank ok..next day, he started to have green stuff coming out of his eyes and my mum then informed that he started a bit of diarrhea. After work, took him to the dr’s straight. His throat was red and that probably caused the nasal track to be infected. After some probiotics and eye drops he seems to be better.

I really do not know what happened there. I shld hv listened to my mum, i.e. not to rush hin into cereal since he was recovering from HFM. Maybe he was allergic to the cereal with milk as all this time he has been on breast milk. Hmm..but when he was 1 mth he was fed formula milk also. Maybe he was overfed. Too much starchy cereal and then EBM. My mum seems to think I overfed him. What do you think?

All these stuff happening to Aaron just dampens my mood. He is such a cutie and I put him thru such an episode. Sorry Aaron, mama’s fault.

On a happier note..he can now sit up, crawl and is very inquisitive. I must say he is really a cute baby.

Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is not an easy task especially during the initial stages. At least, during the first two weeks, new mothers will experience sore nipples when babies suckle as hard as possible for milk when there is none. Backaches and sore necks are also common if not seated correctly during breastfeeding. It is a dream of every mum to breast feed at least during the first 6 months.


Well it was my dream before I had my first kid. However, I was really really disappointed as Arielle din want to suckle at all. She was in fact terrified of the breast. Each time I tried she would scream her head off as if the whole world was crashing on her. I was still determined to give her breast milk so I pumped as hard as I could. Lasted for 8 months as I changed job and my new office did not have a convenient place to pump and to store milk. Well was relieved that it was over although I would ideally wanted it to last for a year. Arielle was however really small size, probably because I din have enough milk then. Poor girl.


This time with Aaron, God has blessed me with heaps of milk. Though I could train him to direct breastfeed, I opted to express the milk for him. In that way, other people can help me feed him. I started expressing 6 times a day but now have cut down to 5 and slowly to 4 times. Nowadays, I really cannot wake up in the middle of the night to do my motherly duty. Too tired! Each session currently I can get at least 6-8 oz compared to Arielle’s time when I was expressing only 2-4 oz. I hope to go on until Aaron is one year but I dun thk I can tahan. May train him to direct feed when he is 6 mths or so. Arielle managed when she was 6 mths. I have stock now to last for at least 3 months if I continue to express. Pic of my freezer. I have one more pack at my mum's and one more at my brother-in-law.

Relaxed & Playful Aaron

Aaron loves to turn and stay on his tummy nowadays. Like Arielle before, he is sleeping less in the day time as it seems he wants to "kay poh" around...

Hungry Aaron

Arielle used to suck her toes as well....

Complete Turn

Aaron has finally managed to turn and lie on his stomach yesterday after a week of half turns. No more bouncer net for him..have to vigilantly keep watch now...

Aaron having a good time with che che

Sleepless nights

Eversince my cofinement lady (aunty) left, Aaron has not been sleeping well at night. Last 3 nights have been the same routine for him. He falls asleep in his cot and just when I am about to sleep, he cries for milk. I breast feed him directly but seems like its not enough for him. He then continues to cry or be agitated until about 3 to 4 a.m.. It may be the wind in his tummy during that period of time as after the 3 a.m. feed, he will poo poo, burp and then sleep. Maybe he misses aunty as at the time when aunty went home, he had already stop poo pooing at night, now he is back to it again - at least twice a night. Well am going to try a different method this time. Will feed him breast milk via the bottle so I know how much he drinks, so he cannot claim that he is still hungry, then see how. Also, I must remember to feed him wind drops.

Well, nowadays I really fear when bed time comes. Dunno what to expect. Pray that Aaron's sleeping patterns will stabilise soon.

Aaron at birth & few days old

Arrival of Aaron - 30 July 2008 - II

I was finally wheeled into the OT at 2 p.m. (I assume so as that was the scheduled time). The OT staff transferred me from the moveable bed to the operating table. I wonder how many OT staff it took to carry me as I was almost 71 kg at that time. The operating table was so narrow, I was wondering if I could fit. The anaesthetician told me to sit up straight so that she could administer the epidural. I could not as I was still in pain from the contractions that still continued to come. I could hear her said “she is still not sitting up straight enough, her spine is crooked”. With the OT staff trying to adjust me I also tried myself to sit up straight but still I could hear “not straight enough, not straight enough”. At one point, I got worried and told her, if cannot, just give me full GA as I was worried that if the epidural was not administered correctly, there was a possibility that I could feel the cut. I could hear her say gently “you’re changing your mind again?”. I replied “only if it is not possible to administer the epidural”. Then I felt a few ant bites at the spine and then a sensation of ants crawling all over the lower part of my body (one would say “semu-semut” when one get that numb feeling).

The anaesthetician then asked me if I could feel my feet moving and I told I could. Heard my gynae’s voice and I started panicking as the operation was about to start and I could still my feet moving. I told her “I can still feel my feet moving (x2)”. She held my hand, calmed me down and used a needle to test my sensation. She poked me at the numb area and asked me to compare the feeling I had with the upper part of my body. Though there was a difference, I could still feel the poke at the lower part of my body and I told her so. She then told me I was already being cut and asked if I could feel. I did not want to imagine myself being cut as it was a scary thought, but yes I could feel the poking needle like sensation as I was being cut. I just shut my eyes and concentrated on other stuff like chatting with the anaesthetician. She was really nice, such comforting voice and we were just chatting like old friends. My gynae also joined in as he was operating on me.

As my gynae hardly have the time to chit chat, I took the opportunity to ask him questions like “when do you think you will retire?”, “where are your kids?”, “are they practising to be doctors as well”? and so on. I also asked him which is better – natural or C and he said natural as the cut is not as big as that of C but I guess it depends i.e. in natural if the labour is not managed well and there is a tear, it would indeed take a longer time to heal compared to a cut. The anaesthetician also asked him why some cervixes cannot dialate and he said it was due to deficiencies in elasticity fibre. We also discussed the difficulties in teaching kids nowadays.

Suddenly I felt my whole body moving like someone’s playing tug of war with my body pulling me apart. I could feel pulling at the lower part of my body and pushing at the upper part of my body. This went on several times and then I could hear my baby crying. I imagine my baby being pulled from the opening while being pushed down from the top. During that moment I just felt I could not breathe, that my heart was being suffocated. I told them I could not breathe but after for a while taking a few deep breaths, I was ok. Aaron had a harsh manly cry…so I asked “why my baby cry like that one?”. Well the answer I got was “He’s got liquid in his lungs now being sucked out” but after that his cry was also the same. I guess he is going to have a harsh voice. The mid-wife then brought my son to me, showed me the tags on his feet to ensure that the tags are of the same number as mine on my wrist. She pointed his birth mark out on his forehead to me. Made baby kiss me twice and off he went to daddy.

After that heard all the sucking sounds of the equipment used to clean the inside of me I guess..while three of us continue to chat. Before I knew it my gynae said “ok, all done”..what a relief I was. They wheeled me out but had to stay at the surgery dept for an hour for observation. I was just lying there and thinking….no!..am not going to have another kid…too painful as in my case, the third would be C straight away – gynae told me during the op. The initial stages of recovery for a C-sect op is really painful!

Anyway, after the hour, I was wheeled to my room and met with Jon there. He was already getting worried as I was away for some time. He thought I had complications. As the epidural was still effective I could chat with him and could even breastfeed Aaron. But as the epidural wore off abt 4 hours later from the time it was administered, great pain set in and I asked for a painkiller. The nurse gave me a penidine injection but it was useless. Simon, WY, Ann, Kevin and their kids visited at night but I was too much in pain to speak with them. WY - thanks for bringing dinner for Jon, Ann – thanks for the bread which he gobbled it down also as he was really hungry..he din have lunch except for the kaya sandwich prepared for breakie.

Was discharged on Friday- 2 nights later. Jon came with my confinement lady to pick me and Aaron. Was told by nursery that Aaron had slight jaundice and so we had to wait for a blood test to be done to determine if he could go home with us. Thank God the reading was low enough for him to be discharged.

Hmmm recently, I find myself thinking, it would be nice to have another girl – probably because, my wound is healing and there is less pain now.

Arrival of Aaron - 30 July 2008 - I

Aaron was supposed to be due on 27 July 2008 but as of 26 July, when I went for a check up, there was still no signs of labour. My gynae then said that if by Wednesday, 30 July 2008, if I have not gone into labour yet, I should check myself into the labour ward, SJMC, at 7 a.m. in the morning for induction. We waited and waited but still no sign of Aaron's entry.

So on the morning of 30 July, after dropping off Arielle at the babysitter, we headed to SJMC. By the time we arrived it was already 7.30 a.m. cos of the usual morning jam at the federal highway. I was really getting very "kan cheong" more of the fear of pain rather than anything else. The nurses got me ready and by 8.30 a.m. I was on drip to induce Aaron out. Note that this time round there were quite a number of student trainee nurses around, apparently under schorlarship and bonded to the hospital. So it was rather irritating to hear the more experienced nurses teaching the trainees esp during the painful periods.

Anyhow, mild contractions came every 15 mins between 9.30 a.m. and 10.30 a.m. Gynae came to check and only dialated one finger tip..:(. From then on I prayed hard for the cervix to loosen up but I guess God had other plans. The contractions came stronger every 5, and then 4 and then 3 mins until about 12 p.m. when the mid wife checked and found no progress at all. The next moment we knew, they took me off the drip and told me I am headed for the op theatre (OT). We looked at each other in surprise and told the mid wife that we wanted my gynae to check and tell us his opinion directly. The mid wife told us that she will call the gynae but normally he would trusts their judgement. I was prepared to be bundled to the OT by 4 trainees who was asking each other how to trasnfer me to the moveable bed and there I was writhing in pain from the contractions. Jon jon and I got kind of cheez off and told them to get in the more experienced nurses.

Arrived at the OT for an apparently 1.30 p.m. schedule but was then told later that the op would be at 2 p.m. Contractions were still coming and I was really getting impatient. Heard the mid-wife complaining that she was told that it was 1.30 p.m. if not she would not have wheeled me down so early and that she has another patient to jaga, and her shift is only until 2 p.m...unfortunately did not manage to eavesdrop on any hospital hot gossips ha ha...

Finally the anaesthetician arrived with another confusion. Apparently it was written down that she was to administer the epidural i.e. only paralysing half the body. The mid wife told her that I have not been asked and no explanations have been given re the choices. The last time with Arielle I took full GA as I was already in so much pain and was fearful to go on half. This time round actually I told Jon that if I was not on a position to decide at the time of entry to the OT pls choose half for me, so I thought it was he who did the selection for me. But while waiting for the op I changed my mind and requested for full, again cos of fear that I can feel the knife. The anaesthetician got confused and informed that all have been prepared for half. Went between half and full several times but thank God for a patient anaesthetician. Finally I agreed to go for the half.

2 p.m. and in I went....more at the op table later....